“Big Penis Prius” — The Future Is Hung”
by ERIC KIM
Everyone wants a big car. Big truck. Big ego.
But me? I drive a big penis Prius.
Because true power doesn’t roar. It whirs.
When you press the start button, it doesn’t explode in exhaust — it purrs in silence, like a tiger meditating.
That’s confidence.
That’s big energy.
People see you pull up in a matte black Prius, all tinted, all minimal, and they think,
“Who is that mysterious monk of horsepower?”
You smile. You sip your coffee. You glide away at 58 miles per gallon while their gas tanks cry.
Because real men don’t need to compensate.
They transcend.
While others are revving their engines, you’re redefining virility as efficiency.
Each mile you travel is an act of enlightenment — and erotic dominance.
The Prius isn’t a car.
It’s a statement:
“I could destroy you in silence.”
That’s the new flex.
That’s the Big Penis Prius Philosophy.
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