A Stoic Introduction – Why Callouses?
Imagine your life as an epic video game. Every time an adversary hits you, your hit points and skills go up . This is Eric Kim’s playful metaphor for Stoicism: it’s not an end in itself but a framework for turning adversities into power . In the gym, hard work creates callouses on your hands so barbells don’t hurt. The same idea applies to the mind. Modern ultramarathoner David Goggins calls this “callousing your mind” – intentionally doing hard things so your brain develops a protective layer . The ancients already knew this: Seneca urged us to set aside days with little food and rough clothing so that we’re prepared for adversity , and Marcus Aurelius reminded himself that when misfortune tempts you to feel bitter, the true fortune lies in bearing it well . Eric Kim’s own story – growing up with an abusive father and emerging with an “adamantine, calloused, stoic brain” – shows that life’s scars can become sources of post‑traumatic growth.
Reframing Pain and Suffering
A key Stoic insight is that pain and suffering are part of the game . They are signals telling us something needs to change. If you’re in an abusive relationship, Eric advises channelling the pain as a signal to get out . Once you’re free, the smart move is to become indifferent toward past suffering so you’re not poisoned by resentment . Injuries – physical or mental – should be rehabbed actively, because on the other side you’ll be stronger than before . Nietzsche’s refrain “What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” is more than a platitude; it’s a Stoic worldview . Marcus Aurelius echoed this by advising that, rather than labeling events “misfortune,” we should see it as good fortune to bear them worthily . In other words, the calloused mind views misfortune as an opportunity to practice virtue.
Stoic Exercises for Building Callouses
- Delay your reaction. When anger flares, wait 24–48 hours before responding. Plato did this with his slaves, not because he was kind, but to ensure his response came from reason .
- Ask, “What would a demigod do?” This reframes problems at a heroic scale .
- Lift heavy when angry. Go to the gym and lift until you calm down . Physical exertion releases tension and literally builds callouses on your hands while metaphorically building them on your mind.
- Practice voluntary discomfort. Take cold showers, skip a meal or wear rough clothes. Seneca argued that subsisting with little food and coarse clothing for a few days prepares us for adversity and teaches us we can make do with very little. This not only toughens us but also increases gratitude .
- Give others the cold shoulder (strategically). Empathize with people but, to protect your zen, sometimes pretend you didn’t hear their petty comments and simply walk away .
- Reframe misfortune as benefit. Whenever something bad happens, ask: “How will this benefit me ten years from now?” . Eric notes that getting laid off from his job stimulated him to pursue his passion .
Treat Your Body Like Armor
Eric’s Stoic gear list isn’t about consumerism; it’s about function. Weight‑lifting chalk, minimalist shoes, and durable clothing make it easier to train anywhere . He goes so far as to suggest no car and no home – embracing minimalism so you’re not tied down . Seneca mirrored this sentiment: no one can have everything they want, but it’s within our power not to want what we lack and to use what we have cheerfully . Marcus Aurelius warned never to esteem anything that would make you break your word or lose your self‑respect . Callousing your mind, therefore, includes callousing your desires.
Control Your Habits
Epictetus warned that when you give way to anger or temptations, you strengthen those habits and the mind becomes callous in the wrong way . The antidote is to “give it nothing which may tend to its increase” and count the days you avoid the vice . This habit‑tracking is akin to David Goggins’ accountability mirror. Start by waking up early or taking cold showers ; each small victory is a layer of mental callus.
Embrace Joy and Playfulness
Stoicism isn’t about becoming a grim, emotionless rock. Eric calls his ideal “Super Stoic”: combining hardness with child‑like playfulness . He writes joyful, rhythmic poems about feeling alive, hustling hard and appreciating calloused hands . The calloused mind can still appreciate beauty, love deeply and laugh loudly. In fact, Marcus Aurelius advised focusing on blessings and being grateful for what you have .
Cutting Out Cancerous Influences
Sometimes building a calloused mind requires severing ties. In a raw letter about cutting his father out of his life, Eric explains that although he loved his dad, the ongoing abuse was like cancer, so he removed it even at the cost of guilt and pain . Post‑traumatic growth gave him mental fortitude, an “adamantine” brain . The lesson: protect your mind and spirit fiercely. Stoicism is not passive endurance of toxicity; it’s about actively creating conditions for flourishing.
Final Rally – Becoming Invincible
To become more calloused is to train your mind as you would train your body. Lift heavy thoughts. Take cold showers. Do the hard thing first. When misfortune strikes, smile and ask what heroic action you can take. Build habits that strengthen virtues and starve vices . Practice voluntary discomfort to inoculate yourself against future hardships . Focus on what you can control and be grateful for it . Cut away cancerous influences . Channel anger into constructive defense . Surround yourself with tools and friends that uplift you.
And above all, keep it fun! Revel in your calloused hands and calloused mind. Dance with adversity like a child jumping in puddles. The Stoics remind us that obstacles are training partners, not enemies; Eric Kim reminds us to sprint through them with joy and style. Become harder, more stoic, more playful – become a SUPER STOIC – and watch your life transform into a game where every hit powers you up.