Reading the marketing copy for new iPhone Pro — too much text! Simplify it!

For example — “Trifecta of tough”— too much of a mouth full! Instead:

“Tough times three”

Simpler, clearer language.

Also not “A strong titanium band.” but instead,

“Titanium band.”

We already know titanium is strong! Titan = strong.

Also, don’t call it a smartphone… call it an iPhone! Calling it a “smartphone” cheapens the concept. For extreme differentiation never mention “others” or the “competition”. Don’t equivilize yourself with others.

Also — “tougher” as a notion is weak. “Indestructible” is better.