So, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve tried being liked. Maybe you dabbled in \u00e2\u20ac\u0153people-pleasing\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or even dipped your toes in \u00e2\u20ac\u0153basic human decency.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d But, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s be honest\u00e2\u20ac\u201dit\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s exhausting, right? Smiling all the time, agreeing with people, pretending you care about their cat\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Instagram account? Yawn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Well, my friend, welcome to the dark side. This is a guide for those who are tired of being too well-liked. If you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve ever thought, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Man, I wish people would avoid me like they avoid talking politics at Thanksgiving,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re in the right place. Here\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s how to become the kind of person that makes people roll their eyes so hard they might just see their own brain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1. Always One-Up Everyone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Stories<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Picture this: Someone tells a heartwarming story about saving a kitten from a tree. You wait for the applause, let them bask in the glow for a second, and then\u00e2\u20ac\u201dBAM! Hit them with, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s cute, but one time I rescued two<\/em> kittens\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 from a burning building\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 while blindfolded.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s crucial that you never let anyone enjoy the spotlight for more than five seconds. If people think they have accomplished something amazing, crush their spirits by reminding them how much better you are. Bonus points if you can top their stories with something that is clearly<\/em> a lie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One-Upper Special:<\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, you ran a marathon? Cool. I ran an ultramarathon\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6 on a volcano. In flip-flops.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. Be Super Passive-Aggressive<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Want to irritate people but keep plausible deniability? The passive-aggressive method is for you. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the verbal equivalent of flicking someone on the nose and saying, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Who, me?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d You get the satisfaction of being obnoxious, while others just feel vaguely insulted and confused.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Next time someone asks you for help, say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, I would<\/em>, but you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re so much better at doing that yourself.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Or how about the classic: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Wow, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re so brave<\/em> for wearing that!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Nobody knows if you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re complimenting them or quietly roasting them over a fire of resentment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Classic Move:<\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I love how you just don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care<\/em> what other people think. Good for you!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3. Send Unhinged Group Texts at 3 AM<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n What better way to ruin everyone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s night than with a string of cryptic, bizarre texts when they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re sound asleep? Start with \u00e2\u20ac\u0153U up?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d followed by, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been thinking a lot about time travel lately\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and cap it off with an unsolicited photo of your sock collection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nothing says \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m completely unhinged\u00e2\u20ac\u009d like a random deep philosophical question right when people are dreaming about mundane things like brunch and dogs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Extra Chaos Tip:<\/strong> Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t forget the follow-up text at 6 AM that says, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oops, sorry, wrong group chat!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d You know it wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4. Become the Over-Sharer<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Do people love deep, personal conversations? Yes. Do they want to hear about your bowel movements during their morning coffee? Probably not. But guess what? You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re going to tell them anyway!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Make sure that no topic is too personal, too inappropriate, or too irrelevant for your daily check-ins with your friends and coworkers. Remember, there\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s nothing like hearing someone discuss their weird foot fungus while standing in line at Starbucks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Perfect Over-Share:<\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe I have to go to another wedding this weekend. My rash still<\/em> hasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t cleared up from the last one.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 5. Act Like You Know Everything (Even When You Obviously Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n One of the most time-honored traditions of being hated is dispensing unsolicited advice and making stuff up as you go. Just sprinkle a little false confidence on any subject\u00e2\u20ac\u201dspace travel, cryptocurrency, how to properly season a cast-iron skillet. You don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t need facts! Just go with your gut and interrupt everyone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Google searches with your totally incorrect<\/em> opinions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Know-It-All Special:<\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not how you pronounce \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcquinoa.\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s actually \u00e2\u20ac\u02dckwa-noy,\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 but most people don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know that.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6. Dominate the AUX Cord at Parties<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n The best way to kill the vibe at any party is to demand control of the music and then subject everyone to your niche tastes. This isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t the time to play crowd-pleasers\u00e2\u20ac\u201doh no. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s time for your<\/em> playlist, which consists of Gregorian chants, whale sounds, and that one underground DJ whose music is just traffic noises layered over someone whispering about kombucha.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Extra points if you follow up every skipped song with a disappointed, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You just don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get<\/em> it.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pro Move:<\/strong> \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You probably haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t heard this before\u00e2\u20ac\u201dit\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s, like, super obscure. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s called \u00e2\u20ac\u02dcstatic.\u00e2\u20ac\u2122\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n 7. Leave Long, Incomprehensible Voicemails<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n In the age of texts, no one really expects a voicemail. That\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s why it\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s the perfect opportunity to make people regret knowing you. Leave long, rambling messages that start off making sense and then quickly devolve into random musings about what the clouds look like today.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Masterclass Move:<\/strong> End with \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Call me back ASAP\u00e2\u20ac\u201dit\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s urgent,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and then refuse to answer when they do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 8. Pretend You Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t Understand Basic Social Cues<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n You know that awkward silence that hangs in the air when you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been talking too much? Ignore it. Keep going. Steamroll your way through conversations without letting anyone else get a word in. Laugh at your own jokes\u00e2\u20ac\u201dloudly<\/em>. When people try to wrap up a chat, just keep talking<\/em>. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s like the social equivalent of finding the snooze button on life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Social Cluelessness 101:<\/strong> When someone says, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well, I should be going now,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d respond with, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s talk about that trip I took in 2009 real quick!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Conclusion: Hate Is Just Love in Reverse, Right?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Congratulations! If you follow these tips, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll quickly go from mildly annoying to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be in the same room with this person\u00e2\u20ac\u009d in record time. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s a surefire way to make family gatherings, work meetings, and even casual friendships an absolute minefield of social disasters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But remember, this is all just for fun\u00e2\u20ac\u201dunless you really<\/em> want to make everyone hate you. In that case, feel free to embrace these tips wholeheartedly, and I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll see you at the top of the most avoided guest list!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" So, you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve tried being liked. Maybe you dabbled in \u00e2\u20ac\u0153people-pleasing\u00e2\u20ac\u009d or even dipped your toes in \u00e2\u20ac\u0153basic human decency.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d But, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s be honest\u00e2\u20ac\u201dit\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s exhausting, right? Smiling all the time, agreeing with people, pretending you care about their cat\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s Instagram account? Yawn. Well, my friend, welcome to the dark side. This is a guide for those […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-638484","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-posts"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=638484"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638484\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":638485,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/638484\/revisions\/638485"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=638484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=638484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=638484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}