{"id":26428,"date":"2016-01-03T15:27:00","date_gmt":"2016-01-03T23:27:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/?p=26428"},"modified":"2016-01-11T11:46:22","modified_gmt":"2016-01-11T19:46:22","slug":"the-joy-of-friendship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/2016\/01\/03\/the-joy-of-friendship\/","title":{"rendered":"The Joy of Friendship"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"The
Paris, 2015<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

I just went to a friend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s wedding the other day\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and man, it was so much fun.<\/p>\n

Singing, dancing, drinking, eating\u00e2\u20ac\u201d the air full of merriment and joy.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

The greatest joy<\/h2>\n

What is one of the greatest joys in life?<\/p>\n

Friendship, companionship, and love.<\/p>\n

The sweet conversation with a loved one that goes on for hours, with the smell of delicious food in the air.<\/p>\n

The \u00e2\u20ac\u0153catching up\u00e2\u20ac\u009d with an old friend\u00e2\u20ac\u201d the reminiscing of sweet old memories.<\/p>\n

The belly-roaring laughter, and acting like a kid again.<\/p>\n

Not concerning or worrying about your life\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s problems\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but focusing on the positive and the benefits you already have in life.<\/p>\n

Sharing a gift with a friend\u00e2\u20ac\u201d why would you want to live in the world as a billionaire if you didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have the opportunity to share your gifts with your loved ones?<\/p>\n

Other simple joys<\/h2>\n

Making yourself look like a fool and dancing on the dance floor without concerning how others see you.<\/p>\n

Taking photos like a child again\u00e2\u20ac\u201d making fun snapshots because you enjoy it, rather than worrying if you are taking \u00e2\u20ac\u0153good\u00e2\u20ac\u009d photos.<\/p>\n

Singing (even though you can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t sing) at the top of your voice with the windows rolled up in your car, and having the people outside look at you like you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re crazy.<\/p>\n

Engrossing yourself in a book, letting time slip though your fingers. Not even stopping to eat.<\/p>\n

The joy of giving a print of yours to a friend, and seeing the genuine smile and joy it brings them.<\/p>\n

Making a scrapbook for a loved one, and reflecting on the fun adventures you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve (already) had in the past\u00e2\u20ac\u201d rather than worrying about the places you haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t traveled to yet.<\/p>\n

Thank God we\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re human<\/h2>\n

Friend, there is so much to be joyful and grateful for in life.<\/p>\n

I was thinking\u00e2\u20ac\u201d man, it is so wonderful to be a (social) human being. All of my favorite memories in life haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t been the food I ate, the coffee I drank, the exotic places I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve visited\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but rather the precious time I spent with people that I cared about.<\/p>\n

For example, I personally don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t care for Dubai at all for a city. It is like a really boring suburb, with the desert all around, and the only place to have \u00e2\u20ac\u0153fun\u00e2\u20ac\u009d is the mall. But the friends I have in Dubai are amazing\u00e2\u20ac\u201d so full of life, love, and an appreciation for friendship (and simple and delicious meals together).<\/p>\n

I have a very simple nuclear family\u00e2\u20ac\u201d it is more or less me, my mom, and my sister. We are a small little trio\u00e2\u20ac\u201d yet we understand each other so well. We are easy-going; not picky, and the greatest joy we share is going camping together, enduring the cold, and eating (delicious) BBQ meat over a campfire.<\/p>\n

I am so grateful for the love I share with Cindy. I lose my patience with her often and get angry at her. But looking at her perfectly-circle (sometimes crazy) eyes\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I beam with joy. She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s taught me so much about being more considerate towards others, to be less irrational, and also has exposed me so much to history, culture, and art.<\/p>\n

I am grateful for my father, even though he has \u00e2\u20ac\u0153done my family wrong\u00e2\u20ac\u009d a lot in the past. I know he still has a lot of love for me and my family\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and he has been through tough times when he was young.<\/p>\n

I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m grateful for all the difficulties I endured as a child. I think growing up with little to no money, the stress of not knowing if my mom could pay the rent that month (and if I was going to be homeless next month), and having little was the best teacher. This taught me a sense of what is really \u00e2\u20ac\u0153necessary\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (food, shelter, love) and what isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t necessary (Playstation, expensive clothes, other bullshit). In-fact, if I didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t grow up \u00e2\u20ac\u0153poor\u00e2\u20ac\u009d, I would have never gotten the hustle and entrepreneurial drive that causes me to hustle today. I see all of the people I know who grew up rich and entitled\u00e2\u20ac\u201d they are not doing anything meaningful with their life. Not really their fault\u00e2\u20ac\u201d being grown up having everything never teaches you independence.<\/p>\n

Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t take your friends for granted<\/h2>\n

Anyways, going back to the point in the beginning of this letter\u00e2\u20ac\u201d friendship is one of our sweetest gifts from God (or whatever spiritual power or concept you believe in). And even if you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re an atheist and don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t believe in God; you have to admit friendship is amazing.<\/p>\n

Friendship costs little. All you need is the company of another.<\/p>\n

When you meet up with a friend, you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t need expensive food, drink, or entertainment. Who<\/em> you decide to eat with is much more important than what<\/em> you decide to eat.<\/p>\n

I read once that one of the biggest regrets people have in life is not<\/em> keeping better touch with their friends and loved ones. A lot of people on their deathbeds regret losing touch with old friends. When I am old and about to die; I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want to be surrounded with stacks of dollar bills, BMW\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s, Leica\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s, and high-end gadgets. I just want the warmth and company of my future children, my friends, and family.<\/p>\n

Isolated living = depression<\/h2>\n

Living in modern society is hard.<\/p>\n

Even though we lived in shittier times in the past (death, poverty, exile, starvation), one of the benefits is that people lived more communally, and family-ties were a lot more tightly-knit.<\/p>\n

Today\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s modern society advocates individuality and freedom over the family and the community. The benefit\u00e2\u20ac\u201d more innovation and creativity and freedom. The downside\u00e2\u20ac\u201d more depression, anxiety, and loss of connection with friends and family.<\/p>\n

The thing I am most grateful being in Socal with Cindy\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s family is the time I spent time with them. We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re also very fortunate that Cindy\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s brother lives on the same block as her family\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s home. My favorite times just involve seeing them everyday, having lunch and dinner together, and just sharing company.<\/p>\n

Invest in friends<\/h2>\n

Money is important in life, but as long as we have enough money for the necessities (paying rent, eating, water, coffee, wifi) \u00e2\u20ac\u201d money is quite useless. In-fact, a lot of our time is wasted trying to acquire more money, rather than living right now.<\/p>\n

I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve personally found that spending money on other people (buying them gifts, giving away cameras, giving away devices, buying others food) brings me much more happiness than spending it on myself.<\/p>\n

And don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get me wrong\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m not some enlightened selfless person. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m selfish. Extremely selfish. I love material stuff, I love money, and I love shopping. But the sad thing\u00e2\u20ac\u201d whenever I buy some material thing, I end up feeling empty & I just want more. I am never satisfied.<\/p>\n

But the acts of \u00e2\u20ac\u0153generosity\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I have given to strangers, friends, and family, have always been \u00e2\u20ac\u0153wise investments\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00e2\u20ac\u201d it brings me true satisfaction and happiness.<\/p>\n

Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be alone<\/h2>\n

\n \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Solitude is the mother of all anxieties\u00e2\u20ac\u009d – Publilius Syrus\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The more time I spend alone, the more anxious I feel, the more depressed I feel, and the more I worry about money, finances, my reputation, etc. But when I am with friends, I feel safe, happy, and secure. I know that even if I were to fall victim to poverty and become homeless, I would have friends I could depend on to take care of me.<\/p>\n

I talked to a friend who was (once) homeless; and they told me that they have no pity for homeless people. Why not? Because to that friend, if you truly become homeless \u00e2\u20ac\u201d it means you have no social support whatsoever (you truly need to burn a lot of bridges to become \u00e2\u20ac\u0153really\u00e2\u20ac\u009d homeless). While I do agree that certain shitty situations make people homeless (especially psychological diseases)\u00e2\u20ac\u201d it made me consider; no matter how \u00e2\u20ac\u0153bad\u00e2\u20ac\u009d someone may be, they will always have family, friends, or acquaintances to help support them in times of need.<\/p>\n

We live in the best world, ever.<\/h2>\n

Another thing I am grateful of living in 2016 is that all of our basic necessities are met. Nobody (at least in America) dies from starvation anymore. Rather; we are dying from drinking & driving, diabetes, cancer, heart disease.<\/p>\n

Rent is getting expensive everywhere (at least here in the Bay Area), but living in a modest manner is always affordable everywhere. I know a lot of people who are tired slaving away to live in the bay area\u00e2\u20ac\u201d they move to Detroit and enjoy a much happier life having to work less, and having more time to pursue their creative pursuits.<\/p>\n

Even living in the Bay Area; you can live in a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153shadier\u00e2\u20ac\u009d neighborhood\u00e2\u20ac\u201d or get more roommates. Sure you will be more cramped, but less stress and anxiety with paying rent means more time to do what you truly love.<\/p>\n

Food is cheap and abundant. We deal more with issues of obesity and over-eating than starvation.<\/p>\n

Wifi is also now \u00e2\u20ac\u0153free\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and ubiquitous (any coffee shop, Starbucks, or even grocery store). Many places are now even offering free public wifi. One day wifi will be as \u00e2\u20ac\u0153free\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and abundant like tap water.<\/p>\n

Not only that, but I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m sure within our lifetime we will see when power and electricity is practically \u00e2\u20ac\u0153free\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (hopefully Elon Musk and other visionaries can truly help make solar power ubiquitous and affordable).<\/p>\n

Transportation \u00e2\u20ac\u201d all of our needs are met. Most metropolitan cities have cheap and easily accessible public transportation. And if you live in a suburb, you can buy a cheap used car that will take you from point \u00e2\u20ac\u0153A\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to point \u00e2\u20ac\u0153B\u00e2\u20ac\u009d reliably\u00e2\u20ac\u201d the only strain is wanting to buy a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153luxury\u00e2\u20ac\u009d car. But does a BMW take you from point \u00e2\u20ac\u0153A\u00e2\u20ac\u009d to point \u00e2\u20ac\u0153B\u00e2\u20ac\u009d more efficiently? No\u00e2\u20ac\u201d any old Japanese car can do that for a fraction of the price.<\/p>\n

Why delay your happiness?<\/h2>\n

It has always confused me why we work so hard to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153save\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and \u00e2\u20ac\u0153improve\u00e2\u20ac\u009d our lives\u00e2\u20ac\u201d when we can easily live happily now.<\/p>\n

Why (excessively) save money for the \u00e2\u20ac\u0153future\u00e2\u20ac\u009d when we aren\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even certain whether we will live to see the future? Why plan on slaving away 40+ years at a company, to hopefully one day retire at age 65 and receive 1\/2 of your salary, to travel and see the world? You\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re not even certain that you will live to 65.<\/p>\n

Go on that trip now. Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t delay.<\/p>\n

Why wait until your loved ones or family are on their deathbeds before settling your beef or animosity towards them? Like Jesus said\u00e2\u20ac\u201d forgive your enemies, and don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t let resentment grow in your heart. I forgot who said this\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but resenting someone is like drinking poison and hoping that the other person will die.<\/p>\n

Rather than lusting for that new digital camera\u00e2\u20ac\u201d why not just use the camera you already use, and learn how to be more creative with your limited means?<\/p>\n

Even with traveling, you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t need to go far away to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153travel.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Honestly for me, the hardest thing for me is just getting out of my apartment.<\/p>\n

Spread your love<\/h2>\n

Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t take your friends for granted. There is nobody who brings more joy, happiness, and fun to your life.<\/p>\n

Tell them that you appreciate them. And show it through writing them a (handwritten) letter, by giving them a small (inexpensive but thoughtful) gift, or just by giving them a big hug. Tell them that the world is better for having them in it.<\/p>\n

Let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s make 2016 a good time for more loving, less envy, and more appreciation for our dear friends.<\/p>\n

Sunday, 3:20pm, Jan 3, 2016 @ Philz coffee in Berkeley, with a lovely \u00e2\u20ac\u0153New Manhattan\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (black), listening to \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Only One\u00e2\u20ac\u009d by Kanye West, after some meditation of reading \u00e2\u20ac\u0153The Cynic Philosophers from Diogenes to Julian<\/em>.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I just went to a friend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s wedding the other day\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and man, it was so much fun. Singing, dancing, drinking, eating\u00e2\u20ac\u201d the air full of merriment and joy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":26430,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-26428","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-posts"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/01\/IMG_1416.jpg?fit=1545%2C1024&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26428","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26428"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26428\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/26430"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26428"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26428"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26428"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}