{"id":25894,"date":"2015-11-22T09:47:38","date_gmt":"2015-11-22T17:47:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/?p=25894"},"modified":"2015-11-23T08:00:39","modified_gmt":"2015-11-23T16:00:39","slug":"practice-random-acts-of-kindness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/2015\/11\/22\/practice-random-acts-of-kindness\/","title":{"rendered":"Practice Random Acts of Kindness"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Downtown
Downtown LA, 2015<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Ugh, I just woke up and haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t had my espresso yet (fortunately it is being made right now).<\/p>\n

Anyways\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I wanted to share an idea that I had when I was rolling out of the couch today: practice random acts of kindness<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Sometimes it is the smallest acts of kindness which can really change someone\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s life (or at least their day).<\/p>\n

Let me give you some examples from yesterday:<\/p>\n

I gave a free print to Michelle and Maurice two of the baristas at ilcaffe (been coming here every morning and they\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been taking care of me). It is such a small gesture (a small 5×7\u00e2\u20ac\u2122\u00e2\u20ac\u2122 print costs not much) but brings so much joy and happiness.<\/p>\n

Sometimes a random act of kindness is just to show compassion and to listen to somebody.<\/p>\n

For example, I was shooting in Downtown LA with some of the students yesterday, and took a photo of a young woman juxtaposed against a man on the far right of the frame. She noticed me taking her photo, and went off on me. She really ripped it into me\u00e2\u20ac\u201d she started to scream all sorts of obscenities to me, and was fuming. At first I thought, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh shit\u00e2\u20ac\u201d this is going to turn out bad\u00e2\u20ac\u009d and was tempted to quickly apologize and run away (what I usually do). However this time, I just stood there, didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t make any excuses (or tell her what my legal rights were or whatever), but just stood there, nodded my head, and listened to her.<\/p>\n

After about 15 minutes (yeah literally 15 minutes) she started to cool down\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and then I agreed with her. Rather than saying that she was wrong, I said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You are right.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She then had nothing else to say, and then I started to ask her questions in terms of what she thought I should do differently. She told me I should ask for permission (I often do) but at the same time she sympathized that a photographer would want to capture a candid moment.<\/p>\n

I was there with several of my students, and believe it or not\u00e2\u20ac\u201d by the end we ended up doing a impromptu photo shoot with her, with her laughing, and we totally made her day. She told us that she had a stalker haunt and fuck up her life the last several years\u00e2\u20ac\u201d which made her paranoid when walking in the streets (I had no idea, of course).<\/p>\n

Lesson of the story? Everyone goes through tough shit \u00e2\u20ac\u201d and it is best not to fight with people on the streets. But to show love, compassion, and to listen to your subjects. And not only that\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but to remember that the people who we photograph on the streets are fellow human beings\u00e2\u20ac\u201d brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers, not strangers.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u201d<\/p>\n

Another thing that brought me a lot of happiness (by giving a random act of happiness)\u00e2\u20ac\u201d giving away a free coffee.<\/p>\n

After leaving the coffee shop yesterday, I got a coffee for my friend Jason, and got another coffee (just in case one of the students didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have a coffee yet). So I met the students in the morning and handed one of the coffees to Jason, and asked the rest of the students, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Who didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have their coffee yet?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Peter, one of the students, raised his hand\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and I handed him the coffee. It was such a small gesture (and didn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t cost me much)\u00e2\u20ac\u201d yet seeing his face light up brought me extreme joy.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u201d<\/p>\n

Selfless giving?<\/h2>\n

I think unless you are a demigod, it is impossible to give without wanting to receive some sort of retribution.<\/p>\n

For example, I love to give (when I see a sense of gratitude from the person I give to). I guess in a way this is a bit selfish\u00e2\u20ac\u201d that I only give to have that \u00e2\u20ac\u0153warm glow\u00e2\u20ac\u009d after doing a generous act.<\/p>\n

Apparently the only truly \u00e2\u20ac\u0153selfless\u00e2\u20ac\u009d way to give is to give to an ingrate (someone who actually despises you for giving to them). For example, if you gave a dollar to a homeless person and they said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Fuck you\u00e2\u20ac\u201d that\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s all you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re giving me?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (this has happened to me, and pissed me off).<\/p>\n

One lesson I learned from Seneca in his book \u00e2\u20ac\u0153On Benefits\u00e2\u20ac\u009d is that when you give to somebody, you should immediately forget that you gave. But when someone gives to you, you should never forget it.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u201d<\/p>\n

Be generous with compliments<\/h2>\n

I am often called a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153flatterer\u00e2\u20ac\u009d\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but I just love people and fashion. Whenever I see someone wear something that looks nice on them (cool sunglasses, watch, outfit) I like to just say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I like your look.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

People spend a lot of time dressing up in the morning and putting on their faces. So when you give them some sort of acknowledgement, nothing makes them happier (to be acknowledged).<\/p>\n

I never get complimented (or rarely) because I am a quite boring person. Generally I wear all black, and wear nothing remarkable. But when I do get a new watch, jeans, or shoes\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I absolutely love<\/em> it when people notice and compliment me.<\/p>\n

A compliment costs us nothing. Why not be generous with it?<\/p>\n

Even when I am approaching strangers on the streets to take their portrait I generally start off by complimenting them (\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh my God, excuse me sir, you look badass, do you mind if I made your portrait?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d) 99% of the time they say \u00e2\u20ac\u0153yes.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

Even if someone isn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t \u00e2\u20ac\u0153objectively\u00e2\u20ac\u009d beautiful \u00e2\u20ac\u201d they always have something beautiful about them to compliment. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve often met older men, and I just love the wrinkles in their forehead and the fire in their eyes. So I will say, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Excuse me sir, you look like you have one hell of a life story. Do you mind if I made your portrait?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d What a fantastic compliment.<\/p>\n

It is hard\u00e2\u20ac\u201d you want to compliment people without being a flatterer\u00e2\u20ac\u201d meaning, you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want to compliment only<\/em> to get something from them. Often I walk in the streets (with my camera in my backpack) and just compliment people randomly. I do admit, I have complimented people in the past (disingenuously) just in order to take their photo. But people are good bullshit detectors\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and could smell my fakeness from a mile away. Not only that, but it made me feel dirty afterwards.<\/p>\n

Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t do unto others and you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want others to do unto you<\/h2>\n
\"Downtown
Downtown LA, 2015<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Everyday I am trying to be a less shitty (and less unethical person). I am no saint by any means\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I am Catholic (But a pretty shitty Catholic)\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I curse, I scheme, and I love money. I do a lot of things (and have done a lot of things) I am not proud about, but I am trying to do \u00e2\u20ac\u0153God\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s work\u00e2\u20ac\u009d\u00e2\u20ac\u201d and follow the path of Jesus (and also Seneca, Marcus Aurelius, and other saint-like people).<\/p>\n

Generally we understand the golden rule as \u00e2\u20ac\u0153do onto others as you would like them to do unto you.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d However this reasoning is a bit flawed\u00e2\u20ac\u201d because not everyone likes to be treated the way you like to be treated.<\/p>\n

For example, I am an attention whore. I love being at the spotlight of a party, and I love attention. But not everyone does\u00e2\u20ac\u201d my more introverted friends prefer to stay in the background, and chill and have more 1:1 personal conversations. I love being in a room with 100 people, and having small and brief chats with everyone. I also love \u00e2\u20ac\u0153small chat\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00e2\u20ac\u201d whereas Cindy can\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t stand it.<\/p>\n

So let us take the opposite approach: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t do unto others as you don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t want others to do unto you<\/em>.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

We don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t know how others want to be treated, but we know how we<\/em> don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t like to be treated.<\/p>\n

For example, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be fake, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t lie, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t steal, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be mean, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t take advantage of others, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be inauthentic, don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be selfish, etc. We need to learn what not<\/em> to do unto others (rather than what to do for others).<\/p>\n

Even if you think about the 10 commandments\u00e2\u20ac\u201d it is mostly about what not<\/em> to do.<\/p>\n

Now earlier I talked about \u00e2\u20ac\u0153practicing acts of kindness\u00e2\u20ac\u009d (which is generally a good rule). Yet at the same time, try to balance that with not doing mean things as well.<\/p>\n

Ethics is tough. Ultimately if you can fall asleep at night and reflect on your days and think, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Today I did at least one act of kindness, and have been a slightly less selfish person\u00e2\u20ac\u009d \u00e2\u20ac\u201d I think you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve done your job.<\/p>\n

Practice your random act of kindness in photography<\/h2>\n

I think the biggest thing we want as photographers is honest feedback, critique, and attention for our photos.<\/p>\n

So try to practice a random act of kindness by leaving a really detailed (4 sentence-long) critique\/feedback\/comment on a stranger\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s photo (or a friend\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s photo). I would rather give one really meaningful comment once a day, than 100 \u00e2\u20ac\u0153nice photo!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d comments.<\/p>\n

Spread the love, because who knows\u00e2\u20ac\u201d today might be your last.<\/p>\n

Love always,
\nEric<\/p>\n

9:20am, at ilcaffe (this place rocks), with a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Hair bender\u00e2\u20ac\u009d double-espresso (Stumptown), Sunday, Nov 22, 2015 in Downtown LA<\/em>\u00e2\u20ac\u201d listening to some nice jazzy music on the speakers here.<\/p>\n

Random thoughts<\/h2>\n

\"0-la<\/p>\n

I met one of the baristas a minute ago (Diana) and I looked at her face and gave her a strange compliment.<\/p>\n

I told her, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Do you mind if I gave you a strange compliment?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Uh\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6sure.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d I then said, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153You have a really great facial structure.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She laughed, and asked me what I did. I told her I was a photography teacher and then showed her some of my \u00e2\u20ac\u0153street portraits.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Needless to say, she was flattered\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but not in a disingenuous way (I think).<\/p>\n

Another random thing\u00e2\u20ac\u201d so I am trying to figure out what direction to take my photography. I enjoyed the second day of my advanced Downtown LA street photography workshop, and played around a bunch of cameras (Olympus OMD EM-5 Mark II, Leica Monochrom (new one), Leica M240, Leica M8, Lumix LX-7). Honestly none of them really struck me (except the Leica M8, which I borrowed from my friend Bil, which makes incredible black and white files\u00e2\u20ac\u201d but is slow as hell). In-fact, the photo I shot at the beginning of this post was on the M8, with my free \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Neopan 1600<\/a>\u00e2\u20ac\u009d preset (no other processing done to the RAW).<\/p>\n

I was talking to my buddy Josh White<\/a>, who has an Olympus OMD EM-5 Mark II\u00e2\u20ac\u201d he suggested me get one as well. Apparently you can switch back the swivel-screen (so it is like you have no LCD screen)\u00e2\u20ac\u201d which is cool. Apparently Alex Majoli<\/a> also shoots with one. The Lumix 15mm lens is a 30mm \u00e2\u20ac\u0153full-frame\u00e2\u20ac\u009d equivalent which would be cool. But then again\u00e2\u20ac\u201d the camera felt a bit too electronic for me, I prefer the analog german-steel of my film Leica MP at home.<\/p>\n

Argh first world problems\u00e2\u20ac\u201d too many cameras, too many problems.<\/p>\n

Even if I stick with my film Leica, I wonder whether I should shoot color (Portra 400) or black and white (Tri-X). And if I shoot Tri-X, whether I should shoot at ISO 400 (processing is cheaper) or keep pushing to ISO 1600 (love the grain and contrast).<\/p>\n

Anyways I have no idea\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I just need to sit on this for a while. Thanks for your support for my random meandering.<\/p>\n

Argh- starting to get a headache from perhaps from the coffee (or needing another coffee). First world problems.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Ugh, I just woke up and haven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t had my espresso yet (fortunately it is being made right now). Anyways\u00e2\u20ac\u201d I wanted to share an idea that I had when I was rolling out of the couch today: practice random acts of kindness.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":25896,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-25894","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-posts"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/0-la-sweat-contact.jpg?fit=2450%2C3098&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25894","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25894"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25894\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/25896"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25894"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=25894"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/erickimphotography.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=25894"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}