Where I Get My Confidence From

The best life is the most dangerous one:

My life story

I am very lucky. I was raised with a particular setup of circumstances which allowed me to be confident from a very young age.

When I say ‘confident’, I mean to say “faith in oneself”.

How? Let me share a bit of me:


The upside of being born Korean

Red selfie wings Eric kim

First of all, I was the eldest son of the eldest son. Which means I was raised like a king. I didn’t do anything to deserve this attention. I was just lucky.

As a consequence, I learned I could do no wrong. I felt like nobility growing up. All the attention was always on me, and ever since I was young I always had my grandma and random people telling me how handsome I was. It was certainly a massive ego boost to me from a young age. And I’m very grateful for this.

Faith in oneself

My thought:

Self confidence doesn’t have a limit, and isn’t a binary. It just keeps on expanding.

For example, it’s not a binary “you’re either confident”or you’re “not confident”. I see self confidence in degrees. The degree of how self confident you are. At the high end, normal people start calling you “egotistical”, “big headed”, and so forth.

But wouldn’t you rather be big headed than small headed?

Walking down steps

Why have self confidence?

To me, if you desire greatness and to do something insanely epic with your life, self confidence is essential. Perhaps BEYOND essential.

For example when I look at the genius of Stanley Kubrick— I know. I know that his self confidence wasn’t an egotistical “self confidence” that smaller people view. Kubrick had a singular and strong vision. He cared so deeply for this vision, that he knew that he needed to obtain it at all costs. At this point it wasn’t about the “ego” of himself. It was the importance of the work. In some ways, Kubrick suspended his ego in order to create such a magnum opus (2001 space odyssey).

Faith as trust

Faith comes from this notion of trust (fides in Latin).

Faith seems to also have this vibe of “blind trust”— to trust in someone, some idea, or something without direct experience, observation, or empirical evidence.

For example let’s say I never started a company. How can I have faith or trust in myself to pursue or build it if I have never even attempted or tried it? I will read books by others who have experience, but ultimately I need a “blind leap of faith” to actually empirically test and attempt it in real life.

The Spartans had faith in King Leonidas, even going to their certain death
The Spartans had faith in King Leonidas, even going to their certain death

Blindness or suspension of “rationality” as very useful

King Leonidas abstract sketch

If you live your whole life being “rational” and “playing it safe”— you will never do or attempt anything grand in your life.

Risk it all

Nietzsche had it right:

The best life is the most dangerous life.

What are you willing to sacrifice or give up in the quest of grandeur and greatness? Let this drive you forward!

ERIC