I got this idea from Derek Sivers — what would your life be like, if you imagined like everything were your fault?
This means that everytime something bad happened in your life — what if you never blamed anybody else, but only blamed yourself?
There is a Zen saying — that when the archer misses the target with his arrow, he only blames himself.
I love this contrarian idea: what if we took no credit for our successes, but only blamed ourselves for our failings?
I feel this would be more liberating than depressing.
Why? Because you realize your entire fate is in your own control.
By no longer blaming anyone else for your shortcomings, flaws, or failures — you have all the power in your life to transform your life.
And not only that, but if you never took credit for your successes — you stay humble, and continue to work hard. You don’t let your ego inflate, and screw up your life.
How can you fix it?
So the next time you get into an argument with your spouse, and they blame you for something, think to yourself: “This was my fault. Now how can I fix it, and prevent this argument or issue from coming up in the future?”
You hate your job, and you’re not where you want to be in life. Rather than complaining to fortune, think to yourself: “I am exactly where I am because of my life decisions. Rather than complaining, how can I make a change or difference in my life, which will improve my lifestyle and my position in life?”
By not complaining, by not blaming others — we gain more optimism. Rather than becoming more negative, we think more positively. Rather than focusing on words, we think more about action. Action to change our lives.
How to take positive action in life
How are some ways we can take action in our lives? Some ideas:
- Figure out what distractions, negative people, or negative energy you can subtract from your life.
- Stop blaming others, stop complaining, and stop accusing others.
- If you hate your job, start looking for a new job and sending out applications.
- If you hate the relationship you’re in, don’t complain, and break up or divorce your partner and start looking for a partner who empowers you.
- Rather than feeling dissatisfied with your creative abilities or your photography, think about what kind of art or photos you can make. What kind of project or focus you can have.
Let us focus on positive and optimistic action in our lives, not blame or negativity.
Always be strong— I believe in you friend.
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